Monday, December 10, 2012

Carbonated Holiness

WARNING: if you would rather not read about suicide right now, please accept a prayer in your direction and feel free to click away immediately and consider whether you also need to call your local crisis line, assuming you have a  local crisis line.

SECOND WARNING: if you cannot imagine laughter ever co-existing in the same conversation, with suicide, probably it will also be simplest if you click away.

The rest of you, please do not say RantWoman did not warn you; see if God also shows up too.

RantWoman is doing her best to offer holiday levity but today the RantWoman Metaphor Manglement Service, the God of Grab the Blind Person and Bless Them, the Computer hacker Barbie School  of Spiritual Nurture, and RantWoman's blog roll are serving up a peculiar brew:

The basic prayers, per Anne Lamott, help, thanks, wow, with a garnish of "laughter is carbonated holiness!"

A blog entry book review for a book that sounds delightful--even though there is also a suicide.

RantWoman's latest Grab the Blind Person and Bless Them moment technically was not a Grab the Blind Person moment but still. The Blessing Individual plonked his bicycle in front of RantWoman while RantWoman was sitting on a bus bench awaiting transport in such a way that it would have been awkward for RantWoman to move. He then proceeded to tell RantWoman she is blessed for ...RantWoman is not quite sure what. Next he needed to tell RantWoman that he expected shortly to be in less modest straits because his rock band "Susie Loves Suicide" has suppposedly signed a contract and is about to go on tour.

RantWoman apologizes to survivors of suicide and suicide prevention resources everywhere, but it was all RantWoman could do not to burst out laughing about the band's name. WHAT kind of prayer can one offer for that?

A Humorless soreheaded prayer perhaps?

RantWoman is reflecting on a moment from Business Meeting. A memorial was being Read  for Rice Bucket Friend. Rice Bucket Friend was the son of Baptist missionaries to China. He grew up wiht a lifelong attention to Daoism and passionate peace commitment. He acquired his Nom de Blog from his Chinese Amahs commenting on the child's capacity and enthusiasm for food. RantWoman  was called to ask whether Rice Bucket Friend's middle daughter's death could be labelled for what it was, suicide. 

No, apparently. The label did not get used at the memorial but RantWoman was reminded of the issue conversationally after the memorial. RantWoman was also reminded that someone she herself met a similar end about the same time. Then the Computer Hacker Barbie School of Spiritual Nurture summoned peculiarly consoling advice from Mathematics Friend  for anyone who finds suicides maddening that...,well...: "If you think your life is worth less than 0 then 0 is an improvement."

RantWoman's final moment of ipossibly inappropriate levity came in the form of the phrase "double mastectomy." Little Sister, after obsessed in every way  search enginesmakepossible earlier in the testsequences is now over the weekend suspended in her current phase of medical recommendation between lumpectomy and double mastectomy. RantWoman considers it a GREAT blessing that, when the possibility of a whole library of different prosthetic bosoms for different days of the week stumbled out of RantWoman's mouth, Little Sister LAUGHED.

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