Monday, November 2, 2015

Binge Blog The bedbugs and "Not Good for the Community."

Apparently the bedbugs want to participate in the Halloween / All Souls day binge blog. Who knew?

Binge blogging surrounded by flapping bats and leering pumpkins
The Bedbugs' favorite picture from RantWoman's inage binge

Recently RantWoman has received various emanations from her Meeting's bedbugs. RantWoman has been given to understand that the emanations have something to do with the bedbugs' custom of offering a State of Society missive on leap days. Since RantWoman's Meeting is getting started early about the State of Society, the bedbugs also seem to have a lot to say.

RantWoman is aware that, as a conscientious interpreter, she is supposed to render utterances word for word, grammatical lapse for grammatical lapse. Frankly RantWoman cannot pick single voices out of the crowd. Some of the bedbugs also either harken back to the number and formal / informal patterns of early Quaker plain speech or just like "they" for being non-gender-specific even if wrong in number, RantWoman is simply going to do the best she can to render the thoughts in somewhat comprehensible English.

Please note : the text will NOT for instance be subjected to either smartphone speech recognition or smartphone autocorrect.

The bedbugs are cranky. They do NOT like the time change.

The bedbugs are dyspeptic. They are being told repeatedly how badly Seattle needs rain and moisture, but they are cross about grey and grey and endless piles of slimy leaves for the likes of RantWoman and Ambassador Thwack to snowplow their way through.

The bedbugs are irascible and irritated. They think they are entitled NOT even to think about traffic hazards, white cane physics (the branch of physics where cars are SUPPOSED to stop at the sight of a person with a white cane in their half of the roadway but nothing about the "supposed to" changes the physics of what happens if the cars do not stop), grab the blind person and bless them approaches to street crossing, otherwise known as drag someone across a busy street ignoring all good sense unintentional encounters with data of the form "Hell yes that is a more dangerous section of street than average." Mainly the bedbugs appreciate the point of even being alive to celebrate All Saints Day despite a number of outrageous Grab the Blind Person and Bless them moments.

Do any readers want to guess who besides RantWoman these outrageous Grab The Blind Person moments involved or WHEN this was occurring.

Hint: "It's not good for the Community" Friend earned this particular nom de blog for, to RantWoman's ear telling RantWoman not even to try to talk about the issue while the other Friend was baying in public about....  Never mind why the $##$@* RantWoman is still upset!

The bedbugs are actually not used to seeing RantWoman so upset she cannot talk, but they realize that if RantWoman is in that state she may or may not be able to pick up the phone and say ever so politely in words that make sense to people who do not even want to think about problems that.... The bedbugs are familiar with RantWoman's proclivity for email, a gift that has been well exercised in this situation.

And guess what! The ONLY indication in the form of direct communication that ANYONE gets how deeply troubling and offensive and #$@Q#$#$ dangerous this problem was to RantWoman is none other than the offending Friend himself! RantWoman's brain is still short circuiting so badly about the entire topic that she is not even going to try to name the titles of all the Friends who.... SOMEONE, please hold them all in the Light and COPE if around RantWoman Light spills over into Inner Blowtorch! And this goes double for anyone taking said Friend's word for it that RantWoman is fine without finding a way to ask RantWoman!

Furthermore the bedbugs see Wonder Quaker on the horizon. At this point RantWoman is glad that Conflict is a Gift of God Friend has himself moved away from his own daily insistence on crossing a very busy street with stoplights at the top and bottom of a hill and a bus stop in the middle between the lights. And did RantWoman mention higher than average car vs ped accident rates, data collected during media coverage of a multiple fatality drunk driver vs ped accident on that same stretch of road.

There. Now will the bedbugs or won't they subside for awhile, at least until Leap Day rolls around...? Will they calm down enough to hear lots of other voices at RantWoman's Meeting?

Stay tuned?


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