Sunday, October 2, 2011

October 2 Disabilities Awareness Item

Dear Friends

Please at least hold the topic of this message in prayer and feel free to hit delete without reading. If you cannot at least hold the topic in prayer before deleting, WHY EVEN HAVE PASTORAL CARE COMMITTEES?

...

I have received two requests to be taken off the mailing list, both from members of Worship and Ministry committee. I am to be true to the Light I am given about wanting SOME kind of common community language for conversations. I also find it frustrating to hear Friends complain endlessly about limitations of energy and then trying to shoot down energy that emerges. Again, I mean to send something out every day. Any day someone else sends something to this list before I get around to it, I will be happy to take the day off.

It is not my experience that God shows up only between 9 and 9 by phone and only in nice seasoned non-distressing increments; sometimes all I can do when I see how God shows up for others is to count my
blessings and be grateful to have only my own problems; some of the time one has no way necessarily of knowing what matters most. I mean it when I try to speak to everyone mattering, but I also think it’s a
call to be open and witness to the workings of God in others’s lives AND in our community even when we ourselves might not even want to look.

The second Friend requesting to be taken off the mailing list is the clerk of Worship and Ministry. Previously, the Clerk’s approach to mentoring is “season yourself;” I apologize but that sounds to me like
a suggestion that I show up in Meeting for Worship with giant salt and pepper shakers. This Friend suggested in person that I try Facebook which I find very hard to deal with or my blog. I DO NOT consider all of the content of yesterday’s attachment suitable for a blog, but if
Friends disagree….

I do need to take responsibility for not calling him during spring nominations season, and I already know I need to find an appropriate venue to discuss some concerns with him. Also, so many people had
already done so many other concerning things that I did not call because it seemed like situations were going to be stuck no matter what.

That Friend and I were part of a lively discussion during Adult Ed this morning about a number of themes:

--a need in any community for many kinds of pastoral care and emotional care of each other functions, and respect for different life experience and ways to fulfill these functions even when there is no paid clergy who might have encountered some of these topics in their training.

--whether committee members needed to be compatible or just able to negotiate conflicts

--whether Friends should show up to Business Meeting expecting their minds to be changed (or even just show up) This Friend was not even at the June 12 Business Meeting where I said over and over, I cannot  ell whether my problem is a wacky circuit in my own brain or a lot of “shut up” messages. I continue to test that issue. At Adult Ed, I said I think it’s important for Friends to show up at Business Meeting expecting that their minds MIGHT be changed and spoke to my own needs for conversations with many voices where one is heard at a time and the result is something maybe no one expected at the beginning.

Today I was chaperoning (The Safest Sex Offender on the Planet) or Adult Education so I am going to write about a few things to do with knowing him. What I mostly mean to write about is maps and how different people decide where to go or not go.

I know I go lots of places many people do not even attempt. I feel very lucky to be able to do this, but I also put a lot of energy into the topic. I have to spend a lot of time sometimes figuring out how
different people are going to get places.

Do people walk, ride the bus, use Access or taxis? What happens if people with different needs and eligibilities want to go someplace together?

Are the routes level for people with bad knees and manual wheelchairs or are they so steep that even a person with a power wheelchair or scooter does not dare attempt them?

What about the sidewalks? Are there sidewalks? Are the sidewalks level or are the full of the kind of concrete vs tree route discontinuities that send people to the ER with a broken wrist or, together with other events from one’s life history cause the words “white cane” to wander across one’s mind?

Are there curb cuts?

Are the curb cuts installed correctly or will a wheelchair user risk tipping over onto their face into the path of oncoming traffic if  actually trying to use the curb cut?

Are there stoplights? Do the stoplights have audio signals? How likely am I to get killed if I rely only on audio signals?

Do the streetlights usually work or do I need to remember to call in and complain?

How far is it to the bus stop? How far is it from the bus stop to my destination? Is anyone in the party going to have trouble travelling that distance? What are people bringing in the way of canes, walkers, shopping carts, backpacks, strollers, mysterious encumbrances?

How far is it from the bus stop to the Light Rail entrance? Is the elevator at my nearest Light Rail station working after MONTHS of announcements that the southbound side is out of order?

What is the sonic environment like around my destination? Can I get enough information out of the din to cross streets safely?

With all that on my mind, forgive me if I cannot always tell you how to find a good parking place.

But back to (the Safest Sex Offender on the Planet). This Friend and I had not really talked more than saying Hi in passing for a long time until after the January Meeting for Business when he was given permission to come to Adult Education on First and Third Sundays of the month. The first time he came he asked at the end of the session for people willing to serve as a chaperone.

I filled out the required paperwork (from the Department of Corrections / his program) and reviewed the tasks: it seemed doable. Well, it seemed doable but as with a whole lot of things everything is an experiment. This item is not going to elaborate on the experiment and trial and error points in mind, but there are some.

I learned right away from (the Safest Sex Offender...), he has a REALLY different map of the city than Ido. He never goes near parks, playgrounds, even bus stops. Just avoiding the bus means his transportation costs and picture are really different from mine. In stores the first thing he does is to grab a shopping cart so there is always something between him and wandering children.

Even though the travel details this Friend and I have to manage are very different, I find it interesting that thinking about travel is such a big thing for both of us.

This Friend is also a big coffee drinker and that made me think of another map drawn as part of a mapping exercise at a workshop I led during one of my disaster preparedness projects. There were several adults with different learning disabilities at the workshop and one of the men made the best map: it was his hand on a coffee mug!

Below my name are a couple illustrative blog links.

In the Light.

(RantWoman)
An item from a couple years ago. Now my mom has two bionic knees which is an improvement. Perhaps Friends who need to think about how Meeting ministers to each other as we age will find this evocative.
http://rantwoman.blogspot.com/2009/08/adventure-travel-crossing-second-avenue.html


Confessions of nutritional sins too.
http://rantwoman.blogspot.com/2009/10/diner-food.html


Again, when Friends need even more help getting around, can you count on curb cuts if you need a wheeled mobility device?
http://rantwoman.blogspot.com/2009/07/who-says-curb-cuts-help.html

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