Friday, February 20, 2015

New Tags

Dear GOD

RantWoman has a brimming inbox, a tangle of to-do's, and more loose threads than an old denim skirt. In terms of not managing to give things up for Lent, RantWoman has a deep sense that she SHOULD focus there.

And yet, RantWoman is being served up the need to announce two new tags for her blog:

Blind spot Assist: when God speaks through Mercedes BenzBlind Spots:
--Moments of blindness tourism, including but not limited to the greatest hits in the realm of Grab the Blind Person and Bless Them
--Meditations on passages in the Bible referring to blind people or blindness
--Irreverent metaphorical references.
--May or may not include other moments of ableism
--May or may not be grounded, centered, reasonable, calm-inducing.
--Probably really need to be held in the Light but RantWoman may have decided preferences about polarized or non-polarized, with or without glare, flames, fluourescence...

Popcorn Kernels
--Moments which if offered in Meeting for Worship would only contribute to a sense of overabundance whether or not such abundance would be well-received (Warning: RantWoman finds the smell of popcorn and the sense of popped kernels overflowing from heated vessels terribly appealing.)
--Excellent uses of steam, particularly when the results are low in fat, crunchy and full of fiber.
--Possibly sometimes enhanced by adding butter and salt, or for those into more organic mortification of the flesh, tamari, garlic power, and nutritional yeast.

Actual Popcorn kernels
Example of a popcorn kernel:
“Jesus Christ on a pizza crust” is:
--a weird allusion to a long ago restaurant review featuring pulled pork and kimchi pizza?
--let’s see gluten, meat, dairy so utterly nutritionally and theologically blasphemous that RantWoman should wash her brain out for even thinking of it?
--the perfect ear worm for ALL KINDS of situations. --a phrase at high risk of tumbling out of RantWoman's mouth presently.

Lord have mercy on us all.

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