Dust

RantWoman has taken note of the fact that it's Ash Wednesday. This taking note is sort of comical. Nowhere in RantWoman's past is there any tie with anything so imbedded in a liturgical calendar as observance of the occasion.



RantWoman is touched by http://gatheringinlight.com/2010/02/17/ash-wednesday-prayer-service/ well, at least some of it.



RantWoman half suspects she should just give up fretting with her Compost melodrama for Lent. RantWoman is nowhere near that self-disciplined. However RantWoman has decided that communications with Dear Friend being basically a mess right now, and a mess with adult email supervision to boot, RantWoman will when addressing the topic be very clear about appreciations and aggravations, never send more aggravations than appreciations, pray, and be grateful for others' praying too.



RantWoman has taken note of other matters on the theme, conversations to be had with others, and points all over her spiritual landscape where much in evidence are the kind of exuberant, well-meaning and not quite seasoned beginning oboe players who long greeted RantWoman on Saturday mornings in childhood.



RantWoman apologizes for leaving the metaphor hanging like the last notes of a concert in the hall, without the flesh of full detail. No, RantWoman does NOT even apologize. It's just that words are coming slowly. There is energy there, and yearning and inquiry and...and words are collecting slowly, haltingly, wandering in several diretions and unpredictably being corraled by one voice and then another.



Sometimes RantWoman is humble about feeling quite held. Other times, RantWoman is inclined, even worse than usual toward three-year-old envy, thoroughly unseemly envy of the license, albeit limited, small children enjoy about really spectacular tantrums. RantWoman would so like to expect better of herself. RantWoman would also so like it if some voices around her hit different notes too. In other words, RantWoman is a demanding bitch who nevertheless is dust no less than anyone else around her.