Trying it again

RantWoman has ample reason to reflect again on Divine Presence in her life. RantWoman's sense of Divine Presence is actually deeply rooted and not dependent necessarily on the behavior of others or on RantWooman's own copious capacity for personal and moral lapses. Sometimes though Divine Presence shows up in wide-open full-bore Inner Blowtorch mode. Last Sunday's Meeting for Worship is still stuck there.

Narrative:

HUGE attendance. Well-gathered Worship, barely disturbed by late comers entering at 11:10. Serious glare zone sudoku weather for RantWoman's eyeballs, but neither full-on urge to do sudoku nor concise coherent Light to minister about the topic emerged. Worship continued to be gathered.

First message: Item from faroff news report about forgiveness among two families united by an alcohol-filled tragedy at a fraternity party.

Long deep silence

Ministry previously written of about not turning the other cheek and resolve to alter circumstances behind Serious Problem incident involving teenage daughter and another resident in that Friend's household. RantWoman has now turned the message over many times in her heart and the salad bowl of RantWoman's own experiences. RantWoman is STILL having trouble hearing a line between spiritual distress and "Help." More on that in a moment.

Another long spell of worship.

Thoughtful message about forgiveness sometimes requiring one to look into one's own soul. This message certainly speaks to RantWoman's condition; RantWoman's experience is that one cannot always interact with the point in crises--even if crises are sometimes when one most needs the thought!

Short spell of worship

(Somewhere in here, RantWoman later learned, Friend with Serious Problem Message left the room.)

MANY kids begin to enter room. More adults also seems to mean more kids. RantWoman is proud and grateful that many new families have come and keep attending notwithstanding the weekly announcement about The Safest Sex Offender on the Planet. Rantwoman also notes the conceptual space for Serious Problem message relative to one specific child but more on that in a moment. Sunday the waves of kids entering Worship also diverted RantWoman from ministry drawn out of her interactions with other media items.

Kids get settled with parents.

Message from adult: we have been talking about forgiveness. I wonder whether children have anything to say about this.
(Okay sure, sometimes prompting like this generates wonderful eye-opening words. Sometimes adults have done all they can with a topic for the moment and diverting conversation is helpful. RantWoman though has serious twitches about expecting kids to solve adult problems.)

Worship closes. Among many announcements, RantWoman decides it is a good time to explain to wonderful exuberant energetic children that RantWoman cannot really see them and does not want to trip and fall on them or spill hot soup on their heads or inflict any other unfavorable interactions with the laws of physics so would they please be careful

RantWoman did not immediately interact further with Serious Problem Message. Only later, when RantWoman was turning over thoughts about a different topic, did "WAIT JUST A MINUTE" crash into RantWoman's consciousness. RantWoman and the committee RantWoman serves on arguably are at least third in line to have caught the Serious Problem reflected in last Sunday's most gut-wrenching pastoral care message, but RantWoman appears to be the one who caught it first! RantWoman would so be glad to share the glory. RantWoman's efforts to articulate concern definitely did not show up connected with clarity as to any specific actions. After much seasoning, "shut up and pray" suggests itself for the time being," but more on that shortly.

Here RantWoman needs to sidestep one point about a key conversation involving multiple Friends. RantWoman has had other conversations involving similar themes and similar dynamics so the comments here may or may not refer to any specific body within her Meeting.

Naming the Problem: Specific legal language? Various ways to minimize or understate seriousness? Temptation to overanalyze based on incomplete facts? Weighing in with comments about different key members of the cast?

Clarifying the cast: in this case, this includes two different ended relationships, not just one as one observer thought.

Changing the subject: it's a difficult topic and we are unclear how to figure out what next, let alone what to do. So let's just change the subject.

Glowering at RantWoman for taking up space in conversation, demanding to talk about difficult topics, and generally being obstinate and short on perkiness and happy talk. One advantage of vision issues is that RantWoman cannot necessarily tell if people are glowering; RantWoman is just assuming based on frequent experience in this area...

RantWoman has now made other people ahead of RantWoman in line to catch the issue season the matter as thoroughly as can be done at this time. There are THREE people in Meeting connected to this pastoral care message. RantWoman and others have reached out to one; RantWoman has in mind to reach out to the other two as opportunity presents itself. There appears to be nothing more that can be done for the time being besides hold the problem in the Light and LISTEN.

RantWoman really does not want to, for instance, tell Friend with a Serious Problem not to bring vocal ministry about her spiritual distress to Meeting for Worship if led. RantWoman does sincerely hope the difficult situations get worked out without any more disturbing messages in Meeting for Worship.

RantWoman has articulated a difference between Serious Problem and Immediate Danger. The Serious Problem has been recognized; RantWoman hopes not to have occasion to need to work harder at evaluating the Immediate Danger issue. RantWoman hopes others besides herself can also listen with an open heart and walk alongside in a centered way as needed.

Meanwhile, RantWoman will resume obsessive interaction with other questions related to expanded participation in community life for the Safest Sex Offender on the Planet. RantWoman still does not know what she is supposed to do with what's on her mind about that stuff either, but RantWoman is versatile and sooner or later she expects her Meeting will find its way to what is needed.