Monday, February 24, 2014

The Nerf War, Take Two

(Look World, RantWoman knows there are supposed to be some trademark signs in here. There aren't. Cope.)

And what is RantWoman doing for the cause of peace and centered attention to questions of those involved in wars:

--Trying to offer centered presence for the likes of the Coffee Strong GI Coffeehouse or in other words welcoming home people from wars RantWoman did not want people sent to in the first place? Umm, EARTH TO RANTWOMAN... Calm down. These people need you to be centered WAY more than you need to have a spell of the vapors.

--Eldering weighty elders for offering spoken ministry about attending an event at the University of WA about the life of local resister to WWII Japanese internment Gorden Hirabayashi and not getting news of the event into the bulletin in time for such as  RantWoman to think of adding the event to her already overloaded schedule?
Mental Note: Hirabayashi, Fred Korematsu, and of course Kenzo Nakamura, World War II fighter pilot and war hero: names to sort out and remember even if one is not terribly well-versed in this history.

--Getting updates on the bus about The Nerf War, Take Two. Ding! Ding! Ding!
Irrepressible Nephew has come in SECOND PLACE, with a unique strategy about which more in a moment.

Bring on the nerf war?

The Nerf War? The annual battle to what, the undeath, between middle school boys and zombies in Irrepressible Nephew's faith community?

Oh Holy Jesus, yeah. That Nerf War.

For weeks RantWoman has been receiving updates about topics of which she would not necessarily prefer to speak. In particular, updates about "modding Nerf blasters."  "Modding Nerf blasters" means doing something to enable these plastic machine gun-like monstrosities to become semiautomatic, to fire without having to cock between rounds. Irrepressible Nephew is good at modding Nerf blasters. In fact, Irrepressible Nephew is highly esteemed among his peers for exactly this skill.

Please note: O Quaker Auntie would just like to crawl under the floor in the presence of this entire issue. On one hand, RantWoman has ranted previously about brown children getting shot for being out in public carrying things that look bad to someone and turn out definitely not to be viable weapons. On the other hand, RantWoman notes the incredible unexamined privilege inherent in chattering openly, in Irrepressible Nephew's innocent, middle school way, all over the bus on Sunday mornings about this. RantWoman could just suffer a severe spell of the vapors.

RantWoman IS glad Irrepressible Nephew is highly esteemed among his peers. RantWoman, though, definitely would not mind for Irrepressible Nephew to be esteemed for something other than "modding Nerf blasters" or semiautomatic anything.

Fear not! God is great and wise and sometimes simply splashes O Quaker auntie in puddles of divine humor.

The middle school nerf war involved a Friday night sleepover but Irrepressible Nephew was still dragging on the bus to Sunday church. He beamed proudly when telling RantWoman about his achievement, but RantWoman asked for more details. RantWoman did not absorb the full details of the point system for staying alive as a human and avoiding getting grabbed and turned into a zombie. RantWoman though is deeply amused to learn that Irrepressible Nephew's strategy for a good bit of the event was simply to stay in a corner out of the main fray with  two Nerf blasters pointed opposite directions away from him and to fire as little as absolutely necessary.
Phew! RantWoman is SO intrigued. RantWoman will manage to put off having a spell of the vapors at least for a little while!

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