Gospel order?

RantWoman was doing her morning stretches, still digesting some reflections about profession as ministry and right livelihood and how one's faith interacts with the norms and vocabulary of different professions. RantWoman promises to say more of what she is talking about, but along comes daily blog roll with other imperatives:

http://www.fum.org/QL/issues/1003/GospelOrderandAccountability.htm

RantWoman has been spending too much time over the last year having conversations about Gospel Order crammed down her throat. It's not that RantWoman has no interest in the topic. Quite the contrary. The problems would be:

1. RantWoman very quickly discerned that the conversations should be bigger than herself and a certain personality alone. This still has not led to clarity about suitable ways to have community conversations. RantWoman wonders in passing whether this thought speaks to the same issues behind a certain personality's recent comment on a certain social networking site about sweeping conflict under the rug.

RantWoman admits she could easily ascribe other motivations as well, but RantWoman is STRIVING to remain respectful. Okay, RantWoman could easily go off about ego and male privilege and even more objectionable terms. RantWoman here is stopped by an anecdote she read once about a new manager at a certain local software monstrosity. New Manager presented something to the CEO; CEO immediately pronounced it the worst idea he had ever heard. One of young manager's colleagues consoled him by saying "Don't worry, you won't hold the title long." In that spirit, RantWoman is NOT taking a great deal personally, except with some question marks about safety and spiritual development.

2. RantWoman slammed hard into a wall of personal reasons (on both sides) and very necessary personal boundaries impeding her capacity to dialogue with said personality. Nothing of what has unfolded has changed RantWoman's mind about the necessity of such boundaries, but again that does not solve the problem of how to talk about what needs to be talked about.

3. RantWoman's Meeting is large and theologically diverse, ranging across Christian, Buddhist, and scientific and other orientations. Some of the time this dynamic is a profound strength, but it has practical consequences like difficulty finding unity about our motivations to oppose torture. This point sticks in RantWoman's mind because lately our Clerk's readings before Meeting for Business have included quite a bit about Gospel Order. (If RantWoman tags this post Compost, perhaps her readers will understand a certain personality is connected with these selections.) RantWoman suspects that many others besides herself really have not internalized a good working definition of Gospel Order. RantWoman is further going all Anabaptist, broadly understood, on the problem and insisting that Gospel Order cannot be assumed simply because people have passed over our threshold and sat down in Meeting for Business. Gospel Order must be freely embraced, joyously, sincerely engaged in, learned and relearned in an ongoing process of continuing revelation every day.

RantWoman means to say more about some challenges of Friends' business process if a Meeting is doing its work and drawing a steady flow of new seekers into its midst and themes on her mind. But that must await time for RantWoman to breathe and other demands of her profession.

(RantWoman is meditating about her timorous heart. RantWoman reread this post one night after it was published, thought it too frank and personalized, and saved it to Drafts. This morning, RantWoman has more data which she will separately digest. In the meantime, RantWoman is goind to seed reverie with the phrase "playing God" and go back to publishing this! RantWoman apologizes in advance for too much esoterica and hopes to have time at some point to pull out bullet points.)

Silence / Open Worship

RantWoman has this fascination with people's experiences of silent worship. RantWoman's blog roll has served up a lively sampling today.



http://gatheringinlight.com/2010/03/25/preparing-for-unprogrammed-worship-in-a-programmed-quaker-meeting/

RantWoman comments: definitely christ-centered, and plenty of specifically Quaker theology. Good lord there are a lot of instructions. Okay, if open worship only happens quarterly, maybe people need to be reminded, but if RantWoman got all of that dumped in her lap the first time she ever went to a Friends Meeting, her head would hurt!



http://highcallingblogs.com/7118/floating-behind-my-eyes/

Something for RantWoman's Baptist Quaker do good reflexes and evocative of the God's aerobic class effects at RantMom's Church.

RantWoman suspects she had more expansive thoughts in mind when she began this post, but if the point is just to retain these links for future reconsideration, perhaps this can just be posted without further adornment.

Give us this day our daily blog roll

RantWoman confesses, she is supposed to be at work. She is her own boss, so she has even less excuse for her brain to be gamboling around the internet than a conventional workplace.

RantWoman knows that the average adult spends a large percentage of his or her time thinking about a few specific things. RantWoman will leave the main content of her mental tempests to her readers' imaginations and will beg indulgence for thinking perhaps that others' mental landscapes in any way resemble her own. RantWoman will simply note that in addition to these predictable streams, she has a lovely basket of aches, pains, crotchets: sore teeth, itchy eyes, dyspepsia, plantar fasciitis,osteoarthritis, and this does not even go near the storms in RantWoman's psyche.


Maybe RantWoman will just blame storms in her psyche for her seemingly unending capacity almost to forget her spiritual center and degenerate into total twitchiness. All RantWoman can say is Thank God for Blog Roll. RantWoman thinks she could say that; what came out is something a little different:

Oh force, spirit, Father, Mother, Christ, Light whose name we cannot agree about and whose all-encompassingness we cannot localize,

Hallowed be thy innumerable names,

Thy Kindom, er Kingdom come, preferably in more accessible less flagrantly royalist language,

on earth, no matter how much of a mess we have made of it, as in heaven which we have not gotten around to completely messing up yet.

Give us this day our daily Blog Roll for we have trusted in Your Divine Guidance and twisted humor about what to put there in the first place and entrusted our spiritual life largely to what washes up daily out of the ether / er. Internet

Lead us not into temptation and that includes all the things we blunder into and all the things on the internet that will suck up all the time we could spent praying, worshipping, and generally doing something, anything besides our fixation du jour.

Forgive us our sins as we have forgiven those who have sinned against us, or considering how well RantWoman is doing about the latter, maybe even a little further.

For thine is the Kingdom and the Power and the Glory, again with the royalist language, mixed in with "thine," prime quality Quakerese which RantWoman will now digress for better research about plain speech, plain dress, plain weather, plain nonsense, forever and ever without end amen.

Composting Conflict Resolution Class

(RantWoman is invoking the journal clause in her blogdom self-identity. RantWoman is actually finishing this item anachronistically and will do the best she can to be present where she was at the time of this entry.)



RantWoman is about to OD on conflicts and conflict resolution workshops for the merry month of March.


To wit:

1. RantWoman has 4 Monday night sessions scheduled of conflict resolution class in her housing community. This involves a vivid assortment of vexatious circumstances. Here is a good further summary of some of the circumstances:
http://rantwoman.blogspot.com/2010/03/conflict-and-irritation-without.html

2. Adult Religious Education class at Meeting features Conflict Resolution as part of the Peace Testimony. Has RantWoman already mentioned that, yes indeed, among Dear Friend's many talents is that he TEACHES CONFLICT RESOLUTION? Let us just say, this fact is adding yet another wrinkle to the problem of just sitting with many forms of complexity.

Furthermore, Dear Friend is clerk of the Adult Religious Education committee and he is leading the discussions! Can anyone guess why this might not be the most comfortable situation in the world? Can anyone guess that there might be simmering conflicts, cognitive dissonance, and numerous other stress symptoms all over the place?

RantWoman has been conscious for several months of monthly cycles of getting flipped out for a few days every month about things to do with the Compost melodrama. This might include reading and responding to drafts of minutes, extra phone calls, late nights pounding out emails draft emails, draft blog posts and lots of extra frequently detectable steam around RantWoman's ears at odd moments for no reason apparent to anyone else. Monthly cycles have mostly been manageable with detectable if idiosyncratic evidence of progress in numerous dimensions.

Weekly cycles are really darn well another thing on the stress-o-meter. RantWoman did not exactly volunteer to be restimulated so regularly. No, she just volunteered the entire staff of the Friendly Neighborhood Center for Extreme Computing to attend the events in her community. The entire staff did not of course sign up, but given RantWoman's role in signing anyone up, not showing up really is not an option.

RantWoman very fast gave herself the option of just skipping Adult Ed but opted not to for two reasons. First, if she wants her body to stay wired to get up in a timely way, she does not want to undo its current training for a month hiatus. Second, for the most part discussions and exchanges among other Friends have been very meaningful, important, and illuminating as far as diverse views and perspectives; in fact, others' comments most assuredly confirm things RantWoman herself tried for months to convey to Dear Friend. The "for the most part" is definitely both to Dear Friend's credit and further ferocious reminder of all that there is to be present with. IN any case, RantWoman has found the discussions more than worthwhile enough to overcome SOME of her jitters.

RantWoman once or twice detected signs of Dear Friend getting overstimulated. RantWoman detects this; RantWoman again has ferocious reflexes of the "sorry, you are not the only person in pain in this conversation" sort. RantWoman does not even feel in any darn kind of hurry about tending to this.

To make matters worse, RantWoman has recently reread a couple emails from the very beginning of the Compost melodrama. In those emails, RantWoman was speaking to some critical work-related deadlines which Dear Friend was exhibiting no respect whatsoever for and instead demanding conversation in a form RantWoman was clear, very clear was not something she felt comfortable about.

RantWoman is very clear about a leading, due partly to her experience around people at the Friendly Neighborhood Center... to go all Testimony on Equality on the situation. "Okay, so you have problems. Get in line. So do others. Your problems are not a big fat chicken-clucking get out of jail free card. Take a number. Be glad I don't just sit you down and make you read Job or somehting."

But back to conflict resolution class. RantWoman appreciates both that the content of the two class streams has been different enough for RantWoman to value both and that at least one week of Adult Ed involved enough of the same lingo as the other class to underscore RantWoman's surprisingly stern leading about further conversation from the following basket of concepts:

Avoid Accommodate Compromise Compete Collaborate

RantWoman is quite clear about leadings and boundaries; RantWoman remains unclear even about with whom to talk further even though RantWoman most assuredly needs help with further seasoning.

RantWoman and Dear Friend currently have a Friend from Oversight helping with adult supervision in email. RantWoman admits this is probably a good idea though numerous rough edges are probably still coming through. RantWoman looked Adult Supervision Friend up on a certain social networking site and expect he may or may not be charmed to be a party to passing on more of RantWoman's peeves about Powerpoint; RantWoman supposes need of a certain level of thick skin comes with Adult Supervision Friend's job title.

RantWoman is also in passing meditating on use of work-related email for decidedly not work-related uses. RantWoman knows some firms may just consider that a perk; others have policies explicitly proscribing it. RantWoman has also had jobs where work-related email is public record. So perhaps when RantWoman is not passing along more than Adult Supervision Friend may think he wants to know of other topics, RantWoman will broach the topic.

RantWoman has also been conscious of including in the mail forwards pointed reference to topics that are important to the life and fabric of many Quaker meetings but that do not trip casually off the tongue in some social contexts. RantWoman has previously posted about one such topic and finally spelled out that thinking to Adult Supervision Friend with an invitation to ask more if he wanted. So far he has not and RantWoman is just filing the observation for now.

RantWoman is meditating about her own ambivalence about further conversations: on one hand, RantWoman desparately needs the right conversations. On the other hand, RantWoman really has no stomach for excess conversation of the chattery and restimulating sort. RantWoman is quite grateful actually for Adult Supervision Friend's comparative reticence, though more of the right conversation is definitely still needed.

As far as the right conversations, RantWoman's mental health practitioner asked her a question that has caused RantWoman to want to have conversations with her siblings. These exact conversations have not happened and RantWoman now suspects that the theme will need to season quite a while longer.

For awhile, RantWoman has also kind of wanted someone to say "Dear Friend reminds you of your father? Really? Why? Oh you poor dear!" and then to move on to the elements of the problem that are just laughable. RantWoman thanks one person for really, really good giggles on this score and does not even apologize that some of the content is way too much even for RantWoman's standards of telling way too much of the truth in her blog. RantWoman supposes she should also be grateful to be deterred from overdoing this line of giggle opportunity by this person's other tiresome issues, but sometimes one takes one's giggles when they come.

RantWoman is writing this in the midst of doing some of her homework for the class in her building. RantWoman grossly oversimplifies with the following vocabulary from the class.

Think

Listen

Collaborate


Okay, so RantWoman got stuck on the Think part: like all good geeks, RantWoman was led to mental data collection. Oh boy did RantWoman do data collection. RantWoman did the sort of data collection which, immediately upon sending it off to someone for help with, RantWoman realized it should in no way get sent any further. RantWoman does not even apologize for leaving it up to her readers' febrile imaginations to divine the content of such data collection. RantWoman is pretty sure most of her readers can just substitute their own darn issues! Meanwhile, this text will join a growing collection of draft emails and draft blog posts RantWoman is glad to have penned and unclear what if anything to do with next.

Supporting our troops, part n+1

RantWoman has, um, unpredictable ways of writing about matters military:



Accessibility features for modern weaponry
http://rantwomanrsof.blogspot.com/2009/12/happy-nobel-peace-prize.html

Gay troops kissing at departure ceremonies
http://rantwomanrsof.blogspot.com/2010/02/dont-ask-dont-tell-valentine.html

The latest on war tax resistance as witness
http://rantwomanrsof.blogspot.com/2010/02/tax-resistance-season.html

selective conscientious objection.
http://rantwomanrsof.blogspot.com/2010/03/selective-conscientious-objection.html

With all that as background, RantWoman now feels duty-bound by imperatives of familial piety to do the very best she can to pen another "support our troops" item, in particular , praying for Youngest Cousin, cousin's husband and stepdaughter, along with the rest of the whole current multinational shooting match.

Youngest Cousin recently found RantWoman through a certain social networking site. RantWoman is really, really glad to have been found. RantWoman has seen Youngest Cousin a handful of times, but Youngest Cousin shares RantWoman's middle name with our long-deceased grandmother. RantWoman remembers considerable amusement observing the degree to which youngest cousin had her father wrapped around her little finger. RantWoman was amused recently to hear RantMom be frankly outraged that Youngest Cousin shared her mother's name. RantWoman takes a different view.

The immediate Rant family plays Boggle pretty fiercely. One time Youngest Cousin and RantWoman had a spell of being stuck in some cabin during rain and started playing Boggle. Youngest Cousin,who a lot of the time well into her 20's just projected an image as agum-cracking teenager, impressed RantWoman because even though she keptlosing, she kept playing and was getting better.

RantWoman has been thinking of the Boggle playing. Youngest Cousin is having her third go at military service driving big vehicles full of flammable material around war zones. Youngest Cousin is a child of the Rocky Mountains; RantWoman has absolutely no doubt Youngest Cousin is up to the tasks. RantWoman does feel obliged to include in her ardent prayers the following sarcastic observation: the US does not send women into combat, We just set them up driving big vehicles loaded with explosives through endless IED's ....

RantWoman also promises to redouble efforts in more Quakerly directions!

Job and....

RantWoman has been meditating for a bit about a Friend's comments in passing on the book of Job. This Friend commented that part of the problem was all of Job's friends telling him what to do instead of just sitting with him. RantWoman can attest that just sitting with can be a huge challenge, that the temptation to tell others what to do is profound; RantWoman admits this is also sometimes connected with an urge to confess others' sins for them rather than to let them come to their own Light. RantWoman would not possibly in any way have sins and kvetches she needs to unburden herself of in the same conversations?

In a similar vein,

http://gatheringinlight.com/2010/03/19/the-three-prodigals-luke-1511-32/

Cleaning this entry up long after the fact, RantWoman is struck by the coincidence of Job and the item about the three prodigals in her head.



RantWoman aspires actually to read:

the book of Job

RantWoman thinks she wishes she could read: commentary, The Book of Job for the Feminazi Bitch with a Chip On Her Shoulder about equality

Remembering Archbishop Romero

RantWoman has been faltering a lot lately about a lot of things. Remembering Archbishop Oscar Arnaulfo Romero on the upcoming 30th anniversary of his death seems like a good place to reorient:


http://blog.sojo.net/2010/03/19/jon-stewart-how-oscar-romero-got-disappeared-by-right-wingers-for-the-second-time/