Facebookistan: rapist Friends rape survivor from long ago

Warnng: FRANK discussion of survivor issues and circumstances related to a rape.

Creepy and full of rationalizations but in places surprisingly less creepy than one might think.

Emily McComs, editor of www.xojane.com  talks about her rapist asking to Friend her on Facebook.

http://www.onthemedia.org/2012/oct/26/?utm_source=local&utm_media=treatment&utm_campaign=daMost&utm_content=damostviewed



RantWoman is posting this here because of a story about 2/3 of the way through about a woman whose rapist Friended her on Facebook. Here is the link for the whole show, for background about the Facebok practies that made this encounter possible.

http://www.onthemedia.org/popup_player/#

EidPrayer

RantWoman apologizes: she has no idea what would be a proper greeting for this occasion but RantWoman wants to offer something appropriate.

RantWoman has been on a mailing list for the Idriss Mosque since sometime after 9/11 and reproduces the email without further comment as an artifact of our day.


In the Name of Allah, The Most Compassionate, The Most Merciful

Location:
McCaw Hall (At the Seattle Center) 321 Mercer Street Seattle, WA

Eid celebration
Friday, October 26, 2012, will be Eid Al Adha


The Program Schedule
9:00 AM: Takbeer
9:30 AM: Eid Prayer
9:40 AM: Eid Khutbah

Come early, bring a rug; security has been provided for everyone�s safety

SECURE VENUE,

The Seattle Police Department will be out in FULL-Force to secure McCaw Hall (At the Seattle Center) and surrounding areas for the protection of all the Muslim community.


Directions, Parking & Maps
http://www.mccawhall.com/plan-your-visit/getting-here


Parking Garage across the street on Mercer

McCaw Hall is located on Mercer Street between 3rd and 4th Avenues, on the north edge of the Seattle Center campus, approximately 2 miles north of the Downtown Seattle business district. The Hall�s street address is 321 Mercer Street.

Via Public Transportation
Buses Bus lines that have stops within a 3-block radius of the main McCaw Hall entrance: 3, 4, 16, 30 & 45 (express)

■Mercer/Warren stop (heading eastbound): 30 & 45 (express)
■Mercer/4th Ave stop (heading eastbound): 30 & 45 (express)
■5th Ave/Republican (heading northbound): 3, 4 & 16
■5th Ave/Mercer (heading southbound): 3, 4 & 16
For more information, please visit King County Metro.

Seattle Center Monorail
Seattle Center Monorail is the nation�s first full-scale commercial monorail system which provides a fun, quick and convenient link between downtown Seattle and Seattle Center.

The monorail departs approximately every 10 minutes from two stations:
■Seattle Center station, adjacent to the Space Needle
■Westlake Center Mall station, at Fifth Avenue and Pine StreetIf you chose to take public transportation, the following site will be offering you assistance in finding the appropriate information:

http://tripplanner.metrokc.gov/cgi-bin/itin_page.pl?resptype=U

Excellent Service Dog Fundraiser--with bonus rant

First click here for a really powerful request from a parent trying not only to look out for her child's interests but also to get help about an appropriately trained service dog.




RantWoman enthusiastically endorses this plea for funds.
http://tapeflags.blogspot.com/2012/10/an-open-letter-from-my-friend-sarai.html


If you have not been fully inspired or your life still suffers a tirade deficit, may RantWoman offer a couple comparatively further remonstrances:
From another mom trying to figure out how to fund training for a dog who already provides many of the benefits of a dog with more training:

...it really pisses me off that disabled people have to either fork over massive amounts of money or go without, when it comes to service dogs. ... Why is it that our government can justify spending massive amounts of money to kill and disable people in other countries, but not to pay for the relatively small cost (for the government, but huge for most individuals who aren't independently wealthy) of a service dog??

Why should parents like Sarai and myself have to worry about our kids wandering off and getting hit by a car, failing in school, etc....just because we cannot afford the training for these dogs?

RantWoman's version from the perspective of a state budget in a state where there are a large number of known billionaires most of whom RantWoman suspects are tragically undertaxed:

The state budget version is why should parents have to bear all the risks just because our poor benighted rich people need some more tax breaks and a lot of people are afflicted by paralyzing phobias every time anyone breathes thoughts of fairer taxation?

Please note: the rants above are framed in terms of government. RantWoman would never discourage the private sector from taking more initiative as well.

Here's hoping Sarai in the post at the top gets her service dog funded and trained. Then she can move on to fun, fun, fun moments such as the ones captured here:

http://rantwomanrsof.blogspot.com/2011/04/service-dogs-simplicity-integrity-and.html


http://rantwomanrsof.blogspot.com/2011/07/service-animals.html

No tracking drone strikes by iPhone?

http://truth-out.org/buzzflash/commentary/item/17576-apple-rejects-phone-app-that-tracks-worldwide-drone-strikes-as-objectionable-content

The Food is Blessed

I will not grumble about other people's prayer practices! I will not grumble about other people's prayer practices! I will not grumble about other people's prayer practices! I will not grumble about other people's prayer practices!


Wait! Who do people think this is? This RantWoman! OF COURSE RantWoman will grumble about other people's prayer practices.

Recently RantWoman was at an event involving representatives of many faith communities. Readers of this blog may be able to guess at the event but RantWoman means at least to TRY to move ahead with positive relations. RantWoman arrived not expecting to be offered a meal and was very grateful to be surprised on that score.

The surprise for which RantWoman was grateful: a wonderful meal of pasta, salad, rolls. NICE brewed coffee and dessert. The menu included CLOTH napkins, solid metal tableware, quality ceramic plates, cups--and saucers, lovely glass water glasses. RantWoman has the impression that there was catering involved or else a very evolved hospitality committee. The ONLY thing RantWoman might quibble about: this would probably not be such a nice meal if one has problems about both wheat and dairy; RantWoman for better or worse has problems about neither and came away very well nourished.

So WHAT is the problem?

This event involved representatives of many faith communities and especially many pastors and denominational staff. As one might expect in such a crowd, someone was asked to offer a blessing. The pastor who spoke explained that his husband is a buddhist, they have one son who is a Unitarian and another son who they wish were something. (sympathetic chuckles). At their household they gather and hold hands and the blessing that came to him for the evening is that the food is blessed by those gathered to eat it.

Okay, sure. Good company is a blessing. The earth is full of bounty for us to appreciate. But wait just a doggone minute! RantWoman of late has been feeling great pangs. RantWoman personally at present does not even sow or reap so much as a chive, let alone do the kind of backbreaking field or factory labor involved in getting the plenty to our tables. RantWoman is acutely conscious that the same imbalances in our food system that make obesity far too easy for RantWoman also mean many are hungry too high a percentage of the time.

And RantWoman does not even want to get started on immigration, the workers who harvest much of our food, their families here and there, wherever there is. Because of course, if RantWoman did get started, pokey evolution along some dimenstions would be inadequate and there would be need for lightning and thunderbolts and wings of fire exhortations, for God's sakes Gosh darn it to FIX OUR IMMIGRATION SYSTEM. And in the meantime, bless the food and thebounty and all the people who have labored to bring it before us.

All RantWoman has to say, the ONLY thing keeping RantWoman from going all John Woolman on the situation: RantWoman is REALLY, REALLY glad that the program agenda those assembled are working on implicity and perhaps explicitly includes concern for immigrant rights!

Healing Pain and the Power of Goodness

By way of blog as filing cabinet, the Western Friend edition of John calvi's address to the 2012 Annual Session of Pacific Yearly Meeting:

http://westernfriend.org/healing-pain-the-power-of-goodness/

Blue Jesus Prayer for our nation (and everyone else?)

RantWoman received this offering from one of RantMom's church friends. Church Friend has many family reasons to need to be held in the Light; one might or might not need Blue Jesus to hold Church freind in the Light. RantWoman is unsure what message Blue Jesus has for her.

God Bless America, indeed! RantWoman is thinking of Weighty Russian Believer friend's thoughts about need both God Bless and God be Merciful (Gospid blagoslovi/ Gospodi pomilyi!)

Follow all the directions for maximum effect although RantWoman thinks she got as much as can be gotten without maximum effect.

Click on the link below.

If you have speakers, turn them on.

I do pray for our nation and its leaders to change their hearts - let us unite in prayer for our nation and our leaders.
When the screen fills up with words, the words tumble to the bottom and new words start up again at the top of the screen.

Listen, read and watch.
Click here >  The Lord's Prayer set to music with Blue Jesus

Pray for our nation
then click on F11 key to go full screen.


God Bless America--and everyone else!!!!

Oh Wolves, what are you to teach us?

RantWoman notes a previous blog post linked below which referred to two wolves from Ojibwe spirituality which have recently showed up in Meeting for worship.




Here by request is appearance in our monthly newsletter of the Story of Two Wolves, encore by request from Friends who first heard it in Meeting for Worship:

.

The Objiwe tribe, the Original People of North America, have a story. It goes like this: Every person has within them two wolves. One is named Love and one is named Fear. Love creates all that is good in life: generosity, forgiveness, acceptance, peace, and all those things which open and expand our hearts and connect us to one another. Fear creates all that is destructive: greed, judgment, prejudice, anger, hatred, violence, and all that makes our own, and others', lives small, separate, and miserable. Love and Fear are always fighting. Do you know which one wins? The one you feed the most!



Here is the ministry which came immediately to RantWoman about the wolves along with some RantWoman does not know when to quit elements which Meeting for Worship was spared.
http://rantwomanrsof.blogspot.com/2012/09/crossings.html

The recurrence of the wolves as a meme in our worship has, predictably generated furhter rants around RantWoman's Inner Blowtorch.

--Who does this bunch of darn palefaces think they are, appropriating elements of native spirituality with nary a native in sight? Yes, of COURSE RantWoman would probably hear the message more clearly if it came in the form of New Testament parables. Still, RantWoman knowingly willfully, intentionally attends worship in a place where messages are delivered by talking wolves. Can you say act of FAITH?

--Cue RantWoman's reflex to rant about Friends in Unity with Nature. HELLO. Nature is not in unity with us. Nature has earthquakes, fierce windstorms, tidal waves, blizzards, a whole wealth of WAYS TO KILL YOU. Wolves, by the way are top of the food chain predators. Yeah, PREDATORS.

--But, But wolves are pack animals. There should be more than two of them. It makes NO sense for them to be eternally at war?

--Oh Boo-hoo! Yep pack animals, and if the pack of wolves chomp on farmers' livestock, as was happening for a pack trying to get restablished in northeastern WA, the Department of Natural Resources (cough!) is still going to eliminate them.

--But, But, who SAYS love never involves fear or limits?

Last First Day's Meeting for Worship was nearly silent with only a few messages all right at the end of the hour. The wolves showed up in two messages right at close of worship.

Call Me Up and I'll Figure it Out for You Friend was called to preach the gospel of Love. Eye Roller Friend, who RantWoman believes, was NOT present when the wolves came up previously, was called to object in colorful spluttering presentation to false duality; the objections to false duality were delivered so vividly that RantWoman immediately got back a blechy feeling several hours later returning to reflect on the morning's messages and on the closing of worship right after Eye Roller Friend's message.

Friends are not at unity about how to respond when God trips over something as messages emerge from Eye Roller Friend. Some would prefer just to ignore him. RantWoman was seasoning a different message which deserves its own post. In the hours later wave of blechiness, RantWoman realized a comment such as "Thank you for expressing your concern so vividly so that we can hold you in the Light in your distress" might have been entirely on point. Maybe.

Oh Wolves, what are you trying to teach us?

Elevator Speeches 1, 2, 3

Elevator speech 1
A. Be true to your Light.
B. Use the correct terminology. Use it all the time as often as possible.

RantWoman takes to heart two pieces of advice from sexuality educator Marja Brandon. First every time RantWoman has heard Marja speak Marja has said something along the lines of "Be true to your Light." For the more secular-minded or those squeamish about Marja's lamguage Gavin DeBecker, author of several books about stalking and per sonal safety says "trust your gut." RantWoman likes "Be true to your Light better, even when the issue is her own inner blowtorch.

Marja's second piece of advice: use correct terminology. Use it correctly. Use it as often as you can. Practice saying it in all kinds of innocuous settings so you have it easily at hand when you most need it. RantWoman means to take this to heart. Really. Yes, but a still small voice keeps tugging at her soul: "Um, earth to RantWoman, you know that much-hyped Russian punk band whose name you are too uptight to say? How is that 'use the correct terminology' thing working out for you?"

Another voice chimes in. "RantWoman, not everyone even wants to speak of all this either." Forget the still small voice thing there are a LOT of people around here with hearing loss. What was that you said? People would rather not talk abut it? It does not matter whether it's important to talk about. The "rather not talk about it crowd thinks you are just stomping on their nerves. Sure . Okay. I CANNOT read their faces so they are going to have to USE THEIR WORDS.



Elevator Speech 2
At the Faith Action Network summit in Seattle.

I am a Quaker...

[appreciative nodding We LIKE it when Quakers come.

Urk! May I adjust your expectations? I am not a Quaker because I am any good at this peace and love stuff; I am a Quaker because I need all the help I can get! Oh Wait, maybe that's TOO MUCH INFORMATION?]

Going around the room, people talked about what speicific concerns rise in their congregations. People mentioned marriaige equality, education. Someone else mentioned offender re-entry.

Here, more or less, was the RantWoman elevator speech for the occasion:
I come wearing two hats, my own congregation (Meeting) and the Friends Committee on WA Public Policy.

At my Meeting,

People engage at the individual level by supporting the League of Women Voters voter registration campaigns, by phone-banking in support of marriage equality before the Ref. 74 vote in November. Several of us feel quite strongly about bicycle, pendestrian, and other transportation issues as part of concern for sustainability.

As a Meeting:, we host a SHARE (self-managed homeless) shelter. Another important ministry is being a spiritual home for survivors of abuse, attending to the safety needs of our members and including two known sex offenders in our community. We did not go looking for the sex offenders ministry. It kind of came and found us; it is not always easy. It is also a rich experience .

[NO reaction RantWoman could detect. Not even any conversational lingering.]

And in terms of dealing on the front end with racial disparity in the criminal justice system (also  already mentioned more than once), an important achievement for the Friends Committee for WA Public Policy has been enactment of a law listng restorative justice as an option for dealing with juvenile offenders.

[also NO reaction RantWoman could detect. Nor conversational lingering. But much else to get on to.]




Elevator speech 3:
It's 3 or 4 country western songs. Please just hold my family in the Light. Lots of things are happening to churn up topics that need elevator speeches. No, frankly I do not need anyone's opinion that my family is crazy. NO ONE except someone inside it gets to say that. Plus, frankly, I am bored of the details. Maybe one of these days continuing revelation and New Light will team up in new directions. In the meantime, all prayers gratefully received.

Blessings all around

Remember awhile ago when RantWoman's clearness committee asked RantWoman something about what she was depriving her Meeting of by keeping quiet about all her adventures with midlife vision meltdown.

Recently Worse Auntie showed up to weigh in on the question. Remember Worse Auntie? Bad Auntie sets bad examples untentionally. Worse Auntie tends to respond to eldering with a sometimes better Quakerese version of  "hell, yes I did that and here's why you should all be grateful!" Recently Worse Auntie showed up wanting to tell all and sundry that every working age adult who might ever have the opportunity to work or better yet hire a blind person should be thrilled, thrilled about the fabulous opportunities to learn from RantWoman, assuming RantWoman knows anything about developing a curriculum. If RantWoman thinks a few more nanoseconds longer, a long list might form of other things people should be thrilled, thrilled about the opportunity to learn.

Then another voice cane upon RantWoman: "RantWoman, you know that blog post you wrote about just no knowing how to handle all those blessings from the 'grab the blind person and bless them' crowd?"

http://rantwomanrsof.blogspot.com/2012/07/grace-as-laugh-riot-and-blindness.html

"Um, RantWoman, you know that part about not knowing what to do with all thsoe blessing?  We feel a little bit the same way. We don't know how to handle all the blessings ... either."

Uhhhhhhmmm....